Raising Strong Girls

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(Luke 12:7) But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.

There is a great responsibility for mothers raising daughters to model proper self-esteem.  This self-esteem that is powered by God's love for us.

As a teenager and up until my mid-20's, I struggled with low self-esteem. It was socially debilitating. I avoided conversations with new people, or better yet kept to myself and missed many opportunities by not getting out of my comfort zone. My internal dialogue was all about the countless reasons why I was not smart enough, pretty enough, and lastly just not good enough. Those thoughts were my inner dialogue to myself and were on repeat. 

It wasn't until my late 20's that I was able to tackle my issues with self-esteem. What changed? I found Jesus Christ. I found my identity in Christ and was overwhelmed with his love for me. I did not have an earthly father that was present, but now I have a heavenly Father that will always be for me and has unconditional love for me. He made me perfectly and the first in Luke 12:7 was a game changer for me. Anytime I repeated the negative inner dialogue I recalled the verse in Luke12:7 and my my was renewed and I had a healthy view of myself that I had never experienced before. As they years have passed, I have gained more strength and my self-esteem come from my identity in Christ.  

This world focuses on how someone looks, making it vital for my daughter (and all girls) to be rooted in the truth, God's truth. The message to just "love yourself," is everywhere. As if you just have to will enough feeling of love and you will be o.k. But the message omits God's truth, which one should deny themselves and seek Him and take up his cross daily. When consumed with seeking Jesus Christ our insecurities fade away. It becomes a process more of Him, less of you. In this process, we don't look to our efforts to have worth but find confidence in who He is. 

A mature relationship with Christ will overflow to those around you and will be the best modeling you can give your daughter to know who she is in Christ. She will see that you are not seeking approval from the world, but rather seeking Christ in your daily walk. It will come across in how you talk to others, in how you dress and how you strive to have a balanced life regarding health and fitness. 

My daughter is 7-years old, and I can recall as early as a 5-year old her asking me if she was pretty. And this question came up and my husband and I made sure to not make statements to build on her looks but rather her heart and she still on her own was seeking approval on how she looked from others.  A little saying that we say to all our children is that "Your heart is more important than what you look like or what others think." We repeat this to her when she asks, "Do I look pretty?" We teach all our children that they are made in God's image and that God does not care about how they look but if their heart is seeking Him. But at the end of the day our children will do what we do not what we say, making it more important that we ourselves our right with God and know who we are in Him. 

This is another verse that I found myself meditating on to help me get away from my negative thoughts and get right with God. I'm thankful every day that I have Jesus Christ as my strength and that I know without a doubt who I am in Him. My hope is that more women and daughters will find their Christ-esteem. 

Jeremiah 1:5 - Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee, and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.